Throughout God’s Word, He provides us direction to help us live a successful Christian life in Him. God’s direction includes His desire for women, to experience the joy of their mate’s arrival, love and marriage. Dating and seeking a mate requires wise guidance, but some fall short of their own success in discovering their mates because of the absence of wisdom. This happens even though we have access to scripture full of wise guidance and emphasizes the importance of using wisdom to make informed choices.
How does scripture explain the importance of using wisdom? Scripture provides us warnings when wisdom is not used, classifies the person who refuses wisdom or does not listen to it as a fool, warns us about what happens when we do not apply wisdom - people fall and fail without it, and there is disrespect without it. Our plans are established when we apply wise counsel; we are admonished to listen and accept it and warned not to forget its teaching. (Proverbs 12:15, 11:14, 15:22, 13:10 20:18, 1:7, 19:20, 3:1-25 ESV) Given all this and more, we tend to apply wisdom in many aspects of our Christian walk, yet women (and men) forget to apply this wisdom when it relates to dating and marriage.
Let’s examine the words wise and guidance. I love breaking down a word to gain a better understanding. Here are the online bing.com definitions for the words wise and guidance:
Wise - intelligent, learned, knowledgeable, informed, sharp, sensible, prudent, discerning, perceptive, insightful, clear-sighted, well advised, well thought out, smart, rational, sound.
Guidance - advice, counsel, direction, instruction, teaching, intelligence, information, tips, pointers, facts.
Based on the definitions for the word wise, any decision which does to pass this test is not wise, sound or smart, etc. And, the definitions for the word guidance, tells us it is well thought out counsel or instruction. As we put our definitions together, wise guidance is defined as wise, sound or smart counsel and instruction. It is interesting to see the words broken down into smaller pieces or definitions, and it is exciting to rebuild the word using the pieces we discovered. Keep in mind, our definitions point us to scripture. As Christians, the scripture is always our go-to source for direction and wisdom. In a nutshell, wise guidance describes the Word of God!
My last scripture about using wise guidance is one of my favorites for my personal wise guidance and is found in Proverbs 3:6. Proverbs 3:6a (KJV) says, “In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” The word acknowledge comes from the Hebrew word “yada”, which means “to know, perceive, see, discern, recognize, be acquainted with or recognize” him. We find duplicates to the Hebrew definitions when looking at the online bing.com dictionary definitions: to recognize, honor, praise, speak highly of, address, accept, grant, allow, connect with. We learn to acknowledge Him is to make sure we see Him in everything concerning our lives.
Part of verse 6 also reads, “in ALL thy ways”, which says this practice of acknowledging, recognizing, seeing, praising, connecting with God in everything, should be natural for us. We are to consider God in everything and not just in hard times, but in our everyday lives; even when deciding about our lifelong mate. God promises to guide us and says, “He shall direct thy path.” But, we must pause to invite Him in every area.
Today, more than ever, it is important that women acknowledge God on their journey to discover their mate. God is not the person to exclude from this process. I believe God already knows who is best for you, just as he knows who He wants for that man of God, who is also prayerfully seeking. But, when coaching single women, I found an unwillingness to apply or an absence of wisdom in their dating process. This shows that God is being excluded. This lack of wisdom reminds me of what Jesus said to Saul on the road to Damascus. Jesus told him in Acts 26:14(KJV) “It is hard for thee to kick against the pricks.” In the scripture Jesus used the analogy of the prick, the farmer and an ox. The prick was a stick which had a pointed piece of iron on the tip used to poke or puncture the ox when plowing. The farmer used the stick to prick the ox when guiding the ox in a specific direction. If the animal rebelled, it did so by kicking against the prick, which resulted in the prick being driven into its flesh. The more the ox kicked, the more it suffered. When a Christian kick against the process God has provided to help them discover their mate and refuses to follow direction, the result will be the same was the ox who refused the farmer’s instruction.
Proverbs 3:5 says, “Trust the Lord with all thine heart” and ends with a warning, “lean not to thine own understanding” - do not do your own thing or without God’s wise guidance. This verse reminds us that leaning to our own understanding or doing our own thing is rebellious. A Christian who does their own thing, outside of God’s Word, outside of His wise guidance, is in rebellion and this takes us back to the story of the farmer, ox and the prick.
To summarize, we see how a lack of wisdom can cause failure or a fall. It was never God’s plan for women to enter this journey to discover love and marriage by themselves. It was always God’s plan to direct our path, send us assistance, and help us make wise choices. We must acknowledge, know, or discern or invite Him into every aspect of our lives, at all times, every day. This should become a practice in our everyday life.
My question to every single woman: Is the process to getting your lifelong mate, husband, prophet, priest or king important enough to make seeking wise guidance your top priority? My answer is, YES, and I have been married 46 years.
How does scripture explain the importance of using wisdom? Scripture provides us warnings when wisdom is not used, classifies the person who refuses wisdom or does not listen to it as a fool, warns us about what happens when we do not apply wisdom - people fall and fail without it, and there is disrespect without it. Our plans are established when we apply wise counsel; we are admonished to listen and accept it and warned not to forget its teaching. (Proverbs 12:15, 11:14, 15:22, 13:10 20:18, 1:7, 19:20, 3:1-25 ESV) Given all this and more, we tend to apply wisdom in many aspects of our Christian walk, yet women (and men) forget to apply this wisdom when it relates to dating and marriage.
Let’s examine the words wise and guidance. I love breaking down a word to gain a better understanding. Here are the online bing.com definitions for the words wise and guidance:
Wise - intelligent, learned, knowledgeable, informed, sharp, sensible, prudent, discerning, perceptive, insightful, clear-sighted, well advised, well thought out, smart, rational, sound.
Guidance - advice, counsel, direction, instruction, teaching, intelligence, information, tips, pointers, facts.
Based on the definitions for the word wise, any decision which does to pass this test is not wise, sound or smart, etc. And, the definitions for the word guidance, tells us it is well thought out counsel or instruction. As we put our definitions together, wise guidance is defined as wise, sound or smart counsel and instruction. It is interesting to see the words broken down into smaller pieces or definitions, and it is exciting to rebuild the word using the pieces we discovered. Keep in mind, our definitions point us to scripture. As Christians, the scripture is always our go-to source for direction and wisdom. In a nutshell, wise guidance describes the Word of God!
My last scripture about using wise guidance is one of my favorites for my personal wise guidance and is found in Proverbs 3:6. Proverbs 3:6a (KJV) says, “In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” The word acknowledge comes from the Hebrew word “yada”, which means “to know, perceive, see, discern, recognize, be acquainted with or recognize” him. We find duplicates to the Hebrew definitions when looking at the online bing.com dictionary definitions: to recognize, honor, praise, speak highly of, address, accept, grant, allow, connect with. We learn to acknowledge Him is to make sure we see Him in everything concerning our lives.
Part of verse 6 also reads, “in ALL thy ways”, which says this practice of acknowledging, recognizing, seeing, praising, connecting with God in everything, should be natural for us. We are to consider God in everything and not just in hard times, but in our everyday lives; even when deciding about our lifelong mate. God promises to guide us and says, “He shall direct thy path.” But, we must pause to invite Him in every area.
Today, more than ever, it is important that women acknowledge God on their journey to discover their mate. God is not the person to exclude from this process. I believe God already knows who is best for you, just as he knows who He wants for that man of God, who is also prayerfully seeking. But, when coaching single women, I found an unwillingness to apply or an absence of wisdom in their dating process. This shows that God is being excluded. This lack of wisdom reminds me of what Jesus said to Saul on the road to Damascus. Jesus told him in Acts 26:14(KJV) “It is hard for thee to kick against the pricks.” In the scripture Jesus used the analogy of the prick, the farmer and an ox. The prick was a stick which had a pointed piece of iron on the tip used to poke or puncture the ox when plowing. The farmer used the stick to prick the ox when guiding the ox in a specific direction. If the animal rebelled, it did so by kicking against the prick, which resulted in the prick being driven into its flesh. The more the ox kicked, the more it suffered. When a Christian kick against the process God has provided to help them discover their mate and refuses to follow direction, the result will be the same was the ox who refused the farmer’s instruction.
Proverbs 3:5 says, “Trust the Lord with all thine heart” and ends with a warning, “lean not to thine own understanding” - do not do your own thing or without God’s wise guidance. This verse reminds us that leaning to our own understanding or doing our own thing is rebellious. A Christian who does their own thing, outside of God’s Word, outside of His wise guidance, is in rebellion and this takes us back to the story of the farmer, ox and the prick.
To summarize, we see how a lack of wisdom can cause failure or a fall. It was never God’s plan for women to enter this journey to discover love and marriage by themselves. It was always God’s plan to direct our path, send us assistance, and help us make wise choices. We must acknowledge, know, or discern or invite Him into every aspect of our lives, at all times, every day. This should become a practice in our everyday life.
My question to every single woman: Is the process to getting your lifelong mate, husband, prophet, priest or king important enough to make seeking wise guidance your top priority? My answer is, YES, and I have been married 46 years.
